Floundering Falls — Level Two

Level one, and a bit of context, can be found here.

 

 

Ayyoha's Paradox — An Adventure Site for Vaarn

Built using the tables from Vaults of Vaarn #3

 

 

What the PCs know. 

Once a respected and sought-after Choreographer, frequently appearing at the funerals of the most prestigious and wealthy residents of Gnomon, Cynop Scincidae found their contracts quickly severed once Inquisitor Shemwell used his terrible informatics to expose Cynop's Cacogenic heritage. They then connected with other disgraced Cacogen poets and politicos to deliver their own brand of justice to Shemwell, who fled into the wastes south of Gnomon after the Cacogen faction retaliated. Though penniless and hungry, Cynop and their Cacogen comrades are educated in several delicate arts and supple skills, and have offered a reward of rich knowledge to the party if Shemwell is brought to them alive.

What they don't know.

Since fleeing Gnomon, the richly-attired and -equipped Shemwell was captured by a horde of psychedelically uplifted myconid bandits, who, cackling, stripped him of his riches and forced him to crawl on all fours, nude as a common pack animal, carrying panniers heavy with supplies. The bandits rove occasionally from their hideout for fresh plunder, often taking Shemwell with them, leashed and grovelling, to assist in verbally smoothing transactions with those plundered. This has been going on for months, and Shemwell, docile, disoriented, and nursing an acute case of Stockholm syndrome, has plum forgot all about the inquisition or those he harmed in the process.

 

Floundering Falls — Level One

The first OSR(ish) dungeon I ever wrote (and ran), back in 2020. Made for Maze Rats, and populated with the tables found therein. For the map, I printed off the first three floors of Dyson's Delve, and made adjustments as necessary. Posts with Floors 2 thru 4 are forthcoming. Whether my ugly edited maps are forthcoming is a matter of debate.

 

EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITY -- FLOUNDERING FALLS

 

Her Ladyship the Baroness of Blunderbone requests the tusk of the Walrakeet, renowned for its restorative properties. The Walrakeet may be found in the region of the Floundering Falls, behind which it is said the beast makes its abode. Convey sundry tusks to Lord Lumpley at Castle Blunderbone for compensation of 1000 silver per tusk, P.O.D..

Science-Fantasy Starter Packages for Into The Odd

The idea was: I wanted to play a little Ultraviolet Grasslands, but bounced quite off the SEACAT system included within the UVG book — some nice flavour there, to be sure, but a modicum too crunchy for my table. Into The Odd is a perennial favourite of mine for its light rules scaffolding and decisive combat — it's like the Crystal Palace of ttrpg systems — so naturally I eventually found my way to Into The Grasslands. This one's got Bastionland-style failed careers (and associated gear packages) which lean into Will's version of the UVG setting, a version inhabited by stoned detectives and souped-up steppe buggies. Lovely writing, but overall a bit sillier than my read of the UVG.

So, necessity (or stubbornness) being the mother of invention and all, I made a thing to fill the void. This one uses the classic ItO approach to starter packages (determined by HP and highest ability score) but the spread is a bit different — see, I don't have as many ideas as Chris, so I had to massage the numbers to make em fit.

 

More Wizards Faffing About

There's been a few good posts recently about wizards who run the world. Wizards as your classic setting-spanning ultra-antagonist. Great stuff!

Thing is, when I think "wizard" I immediately envision the bumbling, star-robed greybeards of screen and page, the Rincewinds and Sword-in-the-Stone-Merlins of the world. The idea here is to do a kind of overpowered fool who'd feel at home in Ankh-Morpork or a Monty Python skit. It's a grab-all-the-dice kinda deal which'll help you generate such splendid wizards as: 

 

Jiffy the Terrific, who specialises in "rube goldberg-omancy", looks perpetually sodden, and is an avid jogger and calisthenician. How terrifying would it be if this guy ran the world?

 

 

Image by Dall-E 2

Minimum Viable Setting

A working definition: the least amount of prep I would need before running the first session of a campaign. Not just a single session, mind you — a whole campaign. For a campaign, one needs a setting with a sufficient amount of hooks and things going on to keep the PCs embedded for at least a few months of in-game time. It's really easy to get bogged down in endless prep with a scope this big — so what's the absolute minimum? 

It could come in a variety of packages — I could imagine maybe a paragraph or page of prose that describes the part of the world where the PCs begin. That might work for some people. Me, I like tables. I also really like the hazard die (aka overloaded encounter die), and a while back over on the NSR Cauldron there was a discussion about the possibilities in expanding the die into a d66 table — each of the six results would drill down to a further six sub-results for some more detail. Could this be the key to a Minimum Viable Setting? I'm willing to give it a try.

 

The Green Gland in 13 Stages

1. Early in Adisaat's history, delegates established what was to become the Porcelain Boulevard in an attempt to cordon off a city's worth of debauchery along a single street. 

2. Later, the paving-stones were replaced by ceramic tile, lending the boulevard its name and facilitating easy mop-up after an evening of vomitous indulgence.

3. Coffeehouses came to dominate the Porcelain Boulevard when opium was outlawed a decade ago, and the dozens of poppy-den proprietors were forced to diversify.

4. The term "coffee" in Adisaat is gestural, used to describe any cured and crushed matter that is then steeped in hot water for consumption. 

5. The Green Gland's menu boasts coffees of charred lotus root, sumac and eggshell, black sesame, and the eponymous Gland, harvested from a clutch of slime jackalopes kept in a pond out back.

6. Slow days, coffeeman Qadrel patiently eradicates the choking kudzu vines perpetually pushing up through the floorboards.

7. It's sandstorm season when the place really gets hopping; locals find respite from the torrent in tall foaming mugs, or at backgammon tables of ash and burled walnut. 

8. One such local is Lashma, puppeteer and dilettante, who often swings by after delivering another of his bawdy, risqué performances.

9. Subaltern clergy-informants of the Church of Shothah seek a scapegoat whose disgrace might elevate them in the eyes of the Reverend; the puppeteer seems like a natural fit. 

10. Shamed and destitute, his puppets incinerated, Lashma seeks another line of work; big-hearted Qadrel will pitch a few silvers for pulling up the kudzu. 

11. Late one evening, the cut vines spring to life beneath the puppeteer's hand, gyrating in strange sensual manners not unlike his previous work. 

12. This goes on for some time, Lashma quietly building a repertoire of puppets from various clippings, running them through a calisthenic regimen, voice lessons and solfège; indeed, he gestates an altogether new art form wherein the puppeteer steps aside, allowing the puppets to speak and act for themselves; scriptwriting and directorial lessons soon follow, and the kudzu begins working into the morning hours, furtively rehearsing a magnum opus.

13. When the time is right, Lashma brings his ensemble to The Green Gland for a magnificent comeback; a crowd of mildly intoxicated patrons stare agape as the bits of kudzu incarnate with terrific shrieking; on a nearby bookshelf the holy scripture of Shothah bursts into flames; the puppets gather and turn demented gazes upon Lashma, over whose features an expression of abject horror slowly unfolds; suddenly the puppeteer goes down as the weird minions climb his body, rip open his soul by way of his abdomen; a silence coldly falls over the appalled crowd and from the sundered intestines a hollow voice observes: I CARVE VEINS INTO REALMS OF DESIRE


Administered for March's RPG Blog Carnival.

d4 Non-supernatural Horror Rumours (Secret Santicorn 2022)

Over on the OSR Discord they're doing the Secret Santicorn, wherein folks submit a prompt (often in the form of a random table heading) that they'd like to see fulfilled. The prompts are then randomly distributed amongst the submitters, much like a Secret Santa gift exchange. I threw my hat in the ring largely as an excuse to get this blog off the ground — and whaddya know, here we are.